I'm pretty cheesed off by movies these days, as well as most books, as well as general preconceptions and misconceptions.

Firstly, I don't get how most Hollywood movies must introduce a theme of love somewhere amidst all the bloody gore, exploding corpses and mangled vehicles. At the end of it all, when all the carnage and chaos (my two favourite conditions) dissipates, the hero stands tall and snogs the supporting actress while the screen fades. Okay, that's a typical classical Hollywood ending, but somehow I just don't get it. Even so in Van Helsing, when bodies were being thrown around, and blood gushing everywhere, why oh why must they include that last useless scene where she blows him a kiss from the heavens, and why must he fall in love with her in the first place?

I get it! It's a conspiracy by all the actors in Hollywood. The only way they get to snog (for the politically correct audience: kiss) hot young actresses is to include some sort of kissing scene in the middle of the movie, no matter how pointless, no matter how much it doesn't contribute to character building, storyline or suspense, then they botch it up three or four times, then say that they are a lousy kisser and need more practice, then can they practice in the guy's trailer?

Let's see, what other pointless kissing scenes are there in Hollywood? Ah too many to count, and the most irritating ones are those which end the movie, showing that love conquers all. I shudder to think of that one. Love conquering all is a myth propagated to the general public. I'm not being grouchy about love, but somehow, I haven't met any real romantics out there who believe in the concept of love, and romance, which is all so only present in Mills & Boon books as well as other sappy books targeted at love-seeking women. (Yeah, I'm sexist. Guys don't read that kind of crap.)

I would think that love is non-existential. Coz every situation seems that love is based on something else, money, good looks, praticality. Or simply as some people would put it, big err... big... err... never mind. Sometimes it's sexual lust, sometimes it's a personal need. Love? Leave it to the poets, romantics and novelists. For the everyday guy, yes a million dollars over love, any time, any day, twice on Sunday with the little red cherry on top with double scoops of vanilla, chocolate and lots of sprinkles with crushed peanuts and also one of those little umbrellas made from toothpicks and cheap paper. Thank you.

This is a test

Tell me Ivan, if logic is the greatest thing that humanity has, should we not be more like the Vulcan race, a la Star Trek? Less emotion, more logic?

I feel this is a nice time to republicise Happy Tree Friends! Do visit! Its cool!

Today I just met an online friend, whom I've not seen for over two years and we met on IRC, which probably was about six years ago. It was nice to meet an old friend again, which sorta makes me realise that, we're both pretty old, me at 20 and he at 23, and we're talking about old times like we are really old fogeys.

I had a pact with another friend of mine, that someday when we are actually old fogeys, retired, rich, with a family and kids have left the house, we would both purchase farms on opposite side of this lonely road which leads just on to nowhere, and we'll both be in this remote area with land just around. Then, it'll be sunset, and I'll be sipping brandy on the porch, when he shouts over, "Hey, you stupid !" Then I'll just shout back, "I can't hear you, you daft ! My hearing aid's off!"

Somehow, just meeting an old friend does beat the monotony of the day.

I guess, I'm thinking about life and death again. I wouldn't like to lay the blame for my macabre thoughts on certain life-threatening bullies who has been harassing me, but yeah, thinking about it again. I've practically been doing nothing meaningful for the past 5 months, and to a certain extent, I guess I'm suffering from some sort of cabin fever. Being stranded in the same room day after day, with barely any social interaction at all, and somehow the monotony does cause miraculous wonders to the already demented mind.

So I do take time outs and review, what have I done in my life that's worth remembering? Somehow here, I draw a blank. What do I plan to do with my life in the future? Also another blank. I guess my life is made out of blank pieces of canvasses still waiting to be painted upon. Hope to find my muse soon.

I'm just a stupid guy, with my stupid post responding to a ranting post somewhere out there, and I guess you would feel somewhat honoured that someone actually took the time to respond to you.

No no, I don't mean any disrespect, just looking at things retrospectively. Try see things from my point of view.

Schumacher made a small error that resulted in the crash. Undoubtedly that was his fault, but neither should you place all the blame on him. I shall clarify some misconceptions you have.

Braking and accelerating in that tunnel was not exactly a stupid thing, it was just done with really bad timing. His purpose was to warm up his brakes for the upcoming round as once the safety car is off he would then have the chance to speed off and catch up, while taking this slow lap to do stuff which he cannot do while actually racing. He can't warm up his brakes if there wasn't a safety car. He is merely preparing for the upcoming lap. Give him some credit, he was won enough F1 Grand Prix to do something as dumb as accelerating and braking. Don't be too quick to pounce on the fact that he could be stupid because you are not giving him enough credit.

And also since they are in a dark tunnel, behind the safety car, they could not have been more than 160 km/h. Just thought I might correct that misconception.

The collision happened. Yeah, he was at fault. But I did feel that Montoya was trying to get on Schumacher's nerves by trying to cut him, avoiding the car, and swerving in front while they were all behind the safety car. Longtime rivalry does cloud judgement on both ends and both sides would be too angry to think things through. At least as a spectator, I would reserve judgement because I don't know what was going on in both of their minds.

And no, the FIA has in no way helped Ferrari to win the race. Two seasons back, they changed the rules to try and cut down Ferrari's advantage. Even so, David Coulthart won the F1 GP some time ago, he only did win in one race. That had to be strange.

You have to admit Schumacher is a good driver and Ferrari is the best car out there. Its a winning combination. Hardly any other car out there can beat a Ferrari in a drag race. And a driver's skill does count for much, but in the end, when you got the resources, expertise and experience in building fast cars like Ferrari, you'll always end up with a damn good car.

I must admit that I do miss Mika Hakinnen, and I think you are a fan of his. Relax and enjoy watching the young drivers. Like I mentioned in my F1 commentary before, it wasn't just because Schumacher didn't win this F1 race that made it exciting. I invite you to read.

And though I must put a disclaimer here, for some things, well, I fear I would be killed if I do. Right?

You know you're a geek when you actually have nightmares that your hard disk crashed and you fall to your knees and scream, "My MP3s!"

This is probably the last place anyone would look for a sports commentary, but I must admit that I just saw the most exciting Grand Prix race in a heck of a long time. This, I assert, is how Formula 1 races ought to be instead of Michael Schumacher winning constantly. Boring!

I can already hear someone chanting, "Schumi, Schumi!" in the background.

This Monaco Grand Prix proved to be most interesting as the track took place right in the city and has very little room for overtaking. Right from the start there was lots of action, when Takuma Sato from BAR-Honda at eighth position just had a great start from behind Michael Schumacher who was fifth on the starting grid and nudged him aside in a brief surge forward and took fourth place, and while Schumacher struggled to regain control, Kimi Raikonen just over took him also. Just 3 seconds into the start of the match, and its already exciting and promising.

Really a great start for Sato, (I know I sound like a sports commentator here who doesn't know what I'm talking about), but the sad part was in a couple laps later, his car erupted in a cloud of smoke which caused everyone behind him, Schumacher, Raikonen, Barichello included, to be blinded for a moment, and Fisichella rear-ended David Coulthard to a most impressive (I struggle for adjectives to describe disasters) crash and accident. He walked away from that mangled machinery.

So much action so fast, well Renault pretty much lead 1-2 all the way to the end, until well, Alonso skidded when he tried to overtake David Coulthard, and his rear tyres skidded and crashed right into the wall of the tunnel of the Monaco race track. At this point, I said, "" coz Michael Schumacher was fourth before this tragedy, and I was hoping he wouldn't have a podium finish this time. I'm pretty much against everyone who wins too much. The underdogs deserve some support.

Okay, while I was swearing, the safety car came on, and to my joy/surprise/shock/elation, Michael Schumacher locked his brakes, lost control and Juan Pablo Montoya whacked one of his front wheels, mangling the machine and breaking the axles. It was amazing to actually see Michael Schumacher limping back to the pit, having to lose this race to a small mistake and a minor technical fault.

He didn't finish the race!

I was practically screaming that. Heh, sorry jh.

So thinking that everything has pretty much settled and the score has already been fixed, it would be a boring last 20 laps, but again I was proven wrong, as it was an actual race for first place between Button and Trulli. For the first time, in this 2004 season, they actually had a race for first place, and it was truly (forgive the pun) undecided. I thought the BAR-Honda was actually faster and better than the Renault, and it was a matter of whether Button could overtake Trulli before Trulli crosses the finishing line. At the end, the timing difference was less than a second.

Okay, results, Trulli first, Button second, and Barichello an embarassing third, more than 70 seconds behind the leaders. I could do so much better in a Ferrari, and though Barichello blamed it on some mechanical fault, he was never much of an impressive driver, he just had a really good and fast car. The only reason he got a podium finish was because everyone else had crashed out. Yeah, I'm pretty critical about that, and well, I just think that some wins are undeserved. I would have thought that Trulli would still win, if Alonso and Michael Schumacher didn't crash out.

Here's my 2 cents.

To my dad.

It was a sleepy coffee shop cramped between a corner car parts store and a local convenience store. The two-storey shop was originaly white, but now mould has starting creeping its way up the sides where water drips down from the roof. Its lime green window shutters upstairs swung lazily open while the pink bunny-patterned cloth hung over the window limply in the hot afternoon.

It was a sleepy coffee shop that no one would bother looking twice at. The aluminium makeshift stove stood emptily in one corner, untouched, ungreased and unused. The old dirty wooden sign above the shop said, Soon Kee Cafe. Only an old man crouched on a wooden stool watching road as cars slithered by without bothering to look.

It was a sleepy coffee shop which overlooked the river which was the focal point of a modest town called Limbang where everything was in a one kilometre radius, and the most exciting event was haggling over the price of a bunch of bananas.

I kept looking at that sleepy coffee shop with the lime green shutters and the pink bunny-patterned makeshift curtains. I kept wondering what it was like inside, 48 years ago, when that shop was still there, when my grandmother lived there and where my father came into this world.

To devineX, I feel somehow I must so reply to your comment on the Proton and the Porsche. Somehow, I feel that some things must be said and the truth be known.

The Proton leaps forward at a pace that can only be equaled to that of a crippled tortoise. Sure it can take you far as a normal car would but with half the life span, minimal safety standards and really crappy interior. Proton engines lack power, and I've seen those with engines that screech and roar and rev at 5,000 - 6,000 revs per minute to crawl to a measly 60km/h. Auto gearshifts of course.

I have never sat in a Proton Wira that had working power windows. Somehow or another, the windows refuse to wind down, or refuse to wind up. Did I mention the crappy air-conditioning system in there? Sometimes it just isn't cool enough.

Okay, aesthetically speaking, on the outside, it looks like a normal car. Nothing fancy, a family car that well, just doesn't seem to fit the family. The odometer and speedometer look like they were printed on paper and slapped on with glue. The cramped interior behind leaves much to be desired for my size 10 feet. And somehow the upholstery always comes loose and torn.

Oh yeah, flip open the newspaper any day and look at the picture of just about any accident involving a Proton or Perodua car. I can vividly describe that picture for you. Imagine a heap of twisted metal, shards of broken glass as well as a modern art painting. That's sort of the picture. Scary man, judging from the malleability of the car's body.

Well this is just my view. I should put a disclaimer here but I'm too lazy. Yeah, I did drive my sister's Proton Wira around a couple of times. It sucks.

And yeah, devineX, I knew you were just being sarcastic.

Okay, well Jia Hui, guess what? I was visiting a Porsche showroom and managed to sit my butt in a Porsche Carrera S4 and Boxster S. I have to admit, it was tempting not to start the engine and drive through the glass ala Gone in 60 Seconds. Heh, it was surreal!

Leather interior which was like pink(??) and auto gearshifts with teptronics, and I was admiring the speedometer which went all the way to 300km/h. So what if you did 80km/h? My cousins in Brunei do average of 100km/h in an El Grande (a van basically) and my cousin's Subaru Impreza WRX could do 0 to 100 in 5.8 seconds, barely less of a second more than a Porsche. Acceleration was great! I feel spoilt. =) Couldn't wait to get my hands on that car.

So what's it like sitting in that car? Yeah, the usual, enjoying the smell of the leather, the feel of the steering wheel, the pressure on the accelerator, the imaginary hot chick sitting next to me, the speed going down the highway, with the police sirens behind me, the feel of the gears. My only regret is that I couldn't take it for a test drive.

Jia Hui, did you know that for Germany, now, new drivers are taught briefly using a Ferrari? The rationale is that the students gotta understand and learn how to drive a powerful car fast and furious? Wow, imagine going down the autobahn at 200km/h. Man, all that is peanuts compared to a mere 80km/h in what? A Honda Civic? Unmodded some more?

Okay, besides that, I also got to see the Nissan 350Z. Okay, impressive too, was going for 71,000 Brunei Dollars. My aunt works at that showroom and she told me she could give me a special price if I wanted to buy it. Sure I wanted to buy it but I don't have the money, so I guess I just got to sit in it and feel rich only for a brief moment in my life.

Ah the simple thrills in life. =)

While sitting back quietly, sipping my cup of freshly squeezed orange juice, I did what any other red-blooded straight guy would do. Watch Miss USA 2004.

Somehow, I'm horrified and amused by two things. Horrified that I'm shorter than most of the participants, and amused that most of them don't really look that attractive on television. Okay, their pictures look a lot better, probably because of digital photography and editing.

But still, I just simply had to comment on most of their favourite songs and movies. Most of them like mush or R&B (for me it's Routine & Boring). Okay, I have to congratulate Miss Oklahoma for having excellent taste in music coz she likes Iris by Goo Goo Dolls. Hopefully not because she watched City of Angels, but because she actually bought the CD and like Goo Goo Dolls. But that's another matter.

I was sorta browsing through their interviews, hoping that one of them would actually enjoy Megadeth or Metallica or Kid Rock. Maybe one of them would enjoy some nice movies like Triple X or Freddy Vs Jason or Alien Resurrection or something action packed and actually exciting. I remain disappointed.

This sorta reaffirms certain stereotypes in the world, that beautiful women are tall, large breasted, blonde, likes romantic movies, listens to classics and acts womanly, whatever that means. So well, what was the point of beauty pageants again other than parading hot lovely chicks on stage in scantily clad clothes for the enjoyment of the male population and reaffirming all stereotypes that exist?

Somehow I miss the entire point of watching sports, especially sports shown "live and exclusive". I've always assumed that exclusivity was not the thing from me, and exclusive must mean that a lot of people must be excluded from this thing, else, it just wouldn't be exclusive would it?

But then all sports shown live are also shown exclusively. So I guess live sports must somehow be targetted at some exclusive bunch of beer-gut, alcohol-imbibed male somewhere between 25 and 50.

Okay, I'm so totally missing the point of sports as entertainment. Its like people sit down and cheer for their team. Even if their team is obviously going to lose. And the results does not exactly matter for a typical fan. And at the end of the day, when you lie cozy and warm in your bed at night, you think back on how you saw Manchester United losing to Chelsea, and you cry to bed, thinking that Chelsea sucks!

What do you lose? What do you gain? Why do people support teams? Why does watching a 90-minute match matter when I can look at the same results in the morning's paper? Somehow, why does the Superbowl, or Euro 2004, or PGA tour, or Grand Prix actually matter to anyone? How does it affect our already too mundane life?

Its all too wierd the stuff that people place importance on. Until then, yeah, I support Chelsea. Why? It's pretty obvious. There's a guy out there who's willing to throw money to "buy" a trophy. I want Chelsea to win, because when they do win, it just goes to show, with money you can do anything. Proving that fact will rub it into all the faces of all those moralists out there that says money is not everything. Oh wait, only people without money say that money isn't everything.

The world needs a good shaking up. I was browsing through some hatemail belonging to www.stickdeath.com and it was sorta funny to see people react with indignation to the death, mutilation and massacre of stick people just for the amusement of us, real people.

I felt that this somehow did mirror real life. How we just shoot people who are of a different colour. Note how all the green stick men are just brutally masssacred? How it is that always a green stick man that faces doom? How it is that some of this crap really does happen in real life on a day to day basis? Death, shootings, drive-bys and insane mishaps?

Okay, I don't really know whether all those crap happens on a day to day basis, but why bother directing indignation at a site that has a little black humour? Its an obscure site with measly graphics (no offense to the author) but I don't see how it promotes violence which happens all around us already. By referencing to a friend's reference, (Thanks Icarus for not telling you about this sooner), http://riverbendblog.blogspot.com/ is a site about life in Baghdad, Iraq. Stuff they never show you on CNN or BBC or all the other international, pro-American (or rather government of America) networks. And I would describe this guy's tone as restraint passion or anger. Vivid description. No, he's right, I cannot even sympathise with him, because I don't understand or even know what's going on in Iraq.

But, still, I've seen many people react stupidly to certain things. Well, here's a quote from Van Wilder: Party Liason. You shouldn't take life too seriously. You'll never get out alive. Things like these, where stick figures grotesquely kill each other is of more concern than there were about 8 genocides in the last century, one third of the world is without clean water, 246 million children are into forced child labour, 6 million people are infected with HIV and the world is embroiled in a war of religion and stupid men (read: Bush). Figures obtained of various UN websites, I didn't fake them.

So if StickDeath is something offensive, do please, check out http://www.happytreefriends.com/index.html. Its just as entertaining if not more.

I feel very much cheated. Cheated by Hollywood, cheated by society and cheated by just about everyone around me.

Question: What is the most powerful thing on this planet?

Okay, withold the answer God. I'm not interested in theological discussions now. What is this thing? I need some answers now! What is the most powerful thing on Earth?

You know, superheroes all have one thing in common. Okay, two things in common, but the second one is just pretty dumb.

Firstly, you know superheroes all have some way of not getting shot. Superman is damn well invulnerable, Batman wears kevlar and hides in shadows, Spiderman has spider sense, the Flash is faster than bullets, Spawn is unkillable, Wolverine just regenerates too fast to kill and so on and so forth.

It'll be pretty cheesy to see a superhero jump into the scene wearing spandex, oh yeah most superheroes wear spandex, some with their underwear on the outside, and then the bad guys actually say, "Shoot him!"

If the superhero is invulnerable, say, Superman, all bullets would hit him and just bounce off and annoy the guy.

If the superhero bleeds, say, just about anyone else, the bad guys shoot so badly that the bullets hit everything but the guy.

So yeah, first to be a superhero, one must be able to dodge, deflect, defend or take shots to the chest without injury.

Secondly, to be a superhero, you need a supervillian. Someone please explain to me why no supervillian ever takes off Batman's or Spiderman's mask?? They would tie up the superhero, make their grand speech of how they would take over the world, and then threaten to take off the superhero's mask, especially if the superhero's real identity is known to the villian. Then at this point some miracle happens, either the sidekick arrives, or the superhero draws upon some reserve of strength which he wasn't too bright to use in the first place, and kick butt.

And supervillians always devise some mean, evil, cracked up way of killing superheroes, like placing them above a vat of acid or some other slow means of death by which all superheroes can escape from. They avoid using direct methods like a bullet to the head or injecting poison directly into veins or just blowing them up with a nuclear bomb.

I just want to rant, how come the smart guys never become supervillians? Its more fun to be evil than good.

Philosophy 101

Okay, now in our left corner we have Mencius, weighing in at 150 pounds, and 5'2". From 372 to 289 BC, Mencius looks to be our heavyweight champion in Chinese philosophy having influenced countless generations in Eastern culture. Without further ado, I give you, Mencius!

Now, in our right corner over here, we have Xunzi, another profound philosopher from China, weighing in at 175 pounds and 5'6". From 310 - 220 BC, he would challenge Mencius for the heavyweight champion title and he looks like one heck of a contender.

Finally, from nowhere in between, we have RavenHawk. A small fry who is currently typing out this blog with 3 years of blogging experience with no philosophical background, only cynism and pessimism to guide his otherwise moralless and twisted thoughts, he would easily be eliminated from this three-way match up.

Without further ado, let the brawl begin!

Mencius: I believe that human nature in itself is good, and men are all born good.

Xunzi: Rubbish! Utter rubbish! Human nature itself is bad, and it is up to the sages to lead the way. If human nature is naturally good to begin with, then why do men commit evils?

Mencius: Supposing people see a child fall into a well ? they all have a heart-mind that is shocked and sympathetic. It is not for the sake of being on good terms with the child?s parents, and it is not for the sake of winning praise for neighbors and friends, nor is it because they dislike the child?s noisy cry.

RavenHawk: I presume you are misguided to think that everyone is of the same moral standing and everyone would similarly feel shocked and sympathetic.

Mencius: Then to not feel that way is to not be human.

RavenHawk: Therefore you have just described those people who don't fit into your description of human nature as no longer human. You have drawn a line and obliterated all those who have no moral standing, like me, into nothing more than animals.

Mencius: To be human is to feel for others.

RavenHawk: To be human is to be sentient.

Xunzi: You have avoided the question that human beings are also capable of selfish reasons. Human beings are prone to lying if they think they can gain from it.

Mencius: But they are misguided, because lies can only bring about disharmony. If everyone lied, there would be no trust, and trust is the basis of society and without trust there can be no society. Thus everyone loses. No one gains from lying.

Xunzi: That is going to extremes. A little lie can do wonders. The modern English term, "white lie" should bring things into perspective.

Mencius: But again lies only bring about mistrust, and trust is important.

Xunzi: Again, you should see that without government, anarchy would rule, people would run rampant and pillage, murder and rape. They have reverted to their natural state.

Mencius: But that was how it was in the beginning. Then people reverted to their original nature and they developed governments. Without a good nature to begin with, no good would have come from this world.

Xunzi: Just like a clay cannot by itself become a pot, a potter must mould it. Just as it is with human beings, it is up to the sages to mould and shape the generations to come.

RavenHawk: Human nature cannot be changed and everyone would revert to their natural tendencies. Not everyone is born with the same moral standings.

Mencius: All men are born equal, it is their upbringing which makes them unequal.

Xunzi: Yeah, what he said.

RavenHawk: You presume too much, tyrants become tyrants because they can, sages become sages because they can.

Mencius: Everyone has an equal standing at the beginning.

RavenHawk: How do you know that for sure? What do you base your observation on other than mere faith in human nature?

Xunzi: That is trivial, because at the end of the day people do change.

RavenHawk: To dismiss a losing argument as trivial is not the mark of a sage.

Xunzi: How dare you!

Mencius: You young insolent unfilial upstart!

RavenHawk: Go ahead, you wanna fight?

Mencius: (throws a shoe which RavenHawk easily ducks and hits Xunzi)

Xunzi: (takes out a knife) Die!

RavenHawk: Die yourself!

Mencius: *whistles* Men! Draw your machine guns!

Oh no! This is getting out of hand! An intellectual debate turned into a bloodbath. There's RavenHawk chewing on someone's ear, and Mencius screaming bloody murder with a MP5, and Xunzi stabbing at someone else's gut. Oh its a mess, the referees are trying to stop this... no wait, what are you doing here.... keep away... keep away.... noo...

*static*

We interrupt this telecast for reasons yet to be disclosed. In the mean time, a word from our sponsors.

My dear.

How my skin crawls at that phrase, but well, nonetheless, I must return such a disgusting pet name you have bestowed upon me graciously, my dear.

Your life is what you make of it, and life is about making mistakes. From my point of view, I don't want you to make too many obvious mistakes. Perhaps we come from utterly different backgrounds, and made of completely different principles. Maybe I'm unqualified to give you advice. No, I think not. My qualification for giving you advice? Because I'm a friend. I'm a friend who owes nothing from you, and owes you nothing, save a very expensive trip to New York.

Don't cry. For reasons obvious enough. Don't get angry. For it never helps.

Somehow, well, perhaps. Its all insanity. Don't you ever feel that the people who really matters are the ones you never gave a crap about? Don't you feel that you've put too much into too few people? Don't you see that of all the friends I've made, I only manage to keep a few after we've long parted? Somehow, you remain blinded, immature and emotional. You refuse to see things in a different light, and I guess its the act of betrayal, when you turn on me and snap viciously as though it was my fault.

You accuse me, that I twist words and pervert the context of the issue. That isn't the issue. Such attacks are needless. I felt the urge to put down the phone. Sometimes you don't deserve what you have, and when you got what you deserve, you think the world is treating you unfairly.

People are crap. There are 6.2 billion people out there, and like rotten apples, when there's one, there's plenty. And you just can't pick all who are nice out, because the most evil are those who conceal their claws until the last moment.

Well, news, I need to confide in you about now. But seeing all that you've been through, I think I'll just shoulder my burden alone, as well as yours. I just hope you realise this. I just hope you understand and stop over-reacting.

Damn, I was hoping when I logged on today, on Blogger, they would offer me an IPO for Google, as seeing I'm one of their most active members. As well as a supporter since they came out. Yes, I'm bootlicking my way to a million dollars. But seeing how as I don't got no IPO, I'm a bit disappointed.

Anyway, on to other horrible news. I heard, to my horror, the Olsen twins are going to NYU. Yup. Olsen twins. Television celebrities. Now how would I intepret this kinda thing? They are going to NYU. I'm going to NYU. They should feel blessed that I'm going to the same college as they are. Okay, enough with the crap. I expect media, I expect rumours and I expect that life would not be some quiet college life as it would have been.

Okay, well, who cares.

I have a headache. It probably has something to do with having not enough sleep. Granted that I sleep for 12 hours a day, this sounds extremely unlikely. But never mind. I have a headache.

Purpose. I am without purpose. I sorta hate my life about now. Maybe I should move in with my sister. I just hate today's monotone. Like a black and white movie. Without sound.