In response to something someone left on my chatterbox, I must protest over the use of names which depict virtue such as Joy, Hope, Charity, Chastity, Faith, Christian, Serendipity, Felicity and whatever. Really. Look, I don't intend to insult those with these names or just poke fun at their expense, but really, I'm just somewhat disturbed by it all. What's in a name? I think nothing much.

What kind of girls come to mind with names like these? Try imagine a girl with such a name. I'll tell you what comes to my mind. A blonde airhead chewing bubblegum suffixing every sentence she says with the phrase, "...like, you know." and sticking her tongue out, rolling her eyes and probably wearing a T-shirt with the sorority letters, Delta Delta Delta.

Maybe I'm just stereotypling, but somehow I seem to think that naming children after virtues does not in any way bestow any sort of said virtue upon these children, but rather, the naming of this virtue completely substitutes the need for this virtue whatsoever and since teenagers always rebel against their parents and the names bestowed upon then, they reject the very virtues of their names and hence a cruel irony is born, where Joy and Hope become Goth chicks with numerous body piercings with a darker outlook on life than me, Charity is probably some rich heiress and her parents hope that her name would inspire her to do charity work rather than mindless partying like a certain Paris Hilton and Chastity is, well... I'll leave it to your sick twisted imagination.

Anyway, yeah, I look forward to a rebuttal from anyone, anyone in particular, and I would definitely welcome guest postings, if my readers (if I have any) would like to argue that I am a chauvinistic, sexist, stereotypical jackass.

Which I'm not afraid to admit.

Bartenders are a horny bunch of people. No joke! Why else would they be bartenders? But just as a demonstration of how much they think of sex, I shall list a couple of recipes here starting with sex.

Sex
Fill glass with ice.
1 oz Coffee Liqueur
1 oz Orange Liqueur
Stir.
Garnish with orange


Sex At My House
Fill glass with ice.
1oz Amaretto
1 oz Black Raspberry Liqueur
Fill with Pineapple Juice.
Shake.
Garnish with Pineapple

Sex At The Beach
Fill glass with ice
1/2 oz Vodca
1/2 oz Southern Comforth
1/2 oz Peach Schnapps
1/2 oz Apple Brandy
1/2 oz Orange Liqueur
1/2 oz Orange Juice
1/2 oz Cranberry Juice
1/2 oz Milk or Cream
Shake.
Strain into chilled glass.

Now there are a lot more recipes, but I think I shall not bore you by listing them all unless you want to try and make these drinks yourself. But here are some other names of drinks.

Sex In A Bubblegum Factory
Sex In A Hot Tub
Sex In The Parking Lot
Sex In The Woods
Sex Machine
Sex On A Boat
Sex On The Beach
Sex On the Beach 2
Sex On The Beach 3
Australian Sex On The Beach
Sex On The Beach In Winter
Sex On The Lake
Sex On The Pool Table
Sex On The Sidewalk

Clearly all bartenders think about while mixing drinks is having sex. I mean, why else would you want to mix cheap liquor and sell it to underaged hot chicks? Anyway, if you're not convinced that bartenders completely utterly think of sex while on the job, here's the final recipe as proof.

Sex With The Bartender
Fill glass with ice
1 oz Vodka
1/2 oz Coconut Rum
1/2 oz Orange Liqueur
Dash Secret Ingredient
Fill wtih equal parts Pinapple Juice and Lemon-Lime Soda.
Garnish the Bartender with Flowers, Jewelry, Cash, Sports Car.

You know, the world has some sort of karmic cycle, or at least some twisted sense of humour.

Aeons ago, I told the most apathetic person I knew (and also most probably the most apathetic person of the entire human race) to get a girlfriend. This guy apparently had the gall to turn around and hand back that very same piece of advice, untaken, untouched, unmodified and unheeded back to me one fine day when I was busy being grumpy and moody.

Anyway, therefore I think it's not a good idea to tell people to go get a girlfriend. Since I'm not in a position to say anything like that. But perhaps this is the world's way of making me laugh. Another dude I know, he's kinda busy sometimes, was talking to me about, well... lets just see an excerpt of the conversation.

Me: thinking of buying a Sony PSP
Busy dude: dude... i haf no money for this sh*t
Busy dude: u haf so much money... shd go find a gf.. and buy her some nice things

Now, this is the first time someone reminded me that I'm single and it brings a huge wide grin to my face that completely hurts my cheeks. Think I cramped it from all that grinning.

I want to instantly launch into a list, Top 10 reasons why a Sony PSP is better than a girlfriend. But I shall refrain. Temporarily. You see, somehow I found it so entirely hilarious that someone claimed that I had so much money that I should go get a girlfriend to spend it on. Now before I get loads of spam from chicks with dating resumes, I must firstly disclaim that I neither admit nor deny the notion that I have "so much money". Secondly, I only date models. Or really hot girls. So send a picture too. Now that I've shamelessly set my terms, let me continue on my thoughts.

Can I say in anyway that it's a tough choice? Hardly, I think not. Sure, 'Busy dude' gave loads of reasons why I should have a girlfriend, the spiritual necessity, the emotional wellbeing, and the excitement in life. Let me see... spiritual, emotional, excitement. Hmm... S... E.... eX...

Ah! So that's what it's all about! Hiding behind all those fancy words reveals the three-lettered reason why I should get a girlfriend.

Anyway, I had a great rebuttal to his entire argument. Seeing that I have to choose between a girlfriend and a Sony PSP, I simplistically reduced this to the simple mutually exclusive(!) choice of being married and poor, or single and rich. When put in these terms, the rational realistic and logical choice for ANYONE would be to remain single and rich.

From a social standpoint, you would be highly respected, sort after and invited to all social functions where there would be a lot of old women dreaming of matchmaking you with their daughter/niece/grand-daughter and you'll have all the time in the world without any relationship obligations to fulfill every bachelor's dream of having a Ferrari and coming back late at night stinking of alcohol and cheap perfume. People want to know and be with rich people. It's a fact! So popularity comes with being single and rich! That's why Hollywood stars never stay married for long.

From a biological standpoint, rampant promiscuity means your genes are further widespread. And you can't be married and promiscuous. Nuff said.

From a domestic standpoint, here is where I make my strongest argument. One of the major factors of divorces is because of poverty. Families below the poverty line are known to have a much higher rate of divorce, and basically whoever said "Come with me and be my love" (Christopher Marlowe) doesn't realise that poverty breeds discontent and arguments in any household, and even shepherds will enter argument with their wives over small financial matters. It gives the couple something extra to argue about. You would never ever hear a wife telling her husband, "You hardworking clod! Stop working! You have too much money I can't spend it all on my credit card." So by choosing the option "Married and poor" there is a much higher chance of divorce, thereby leaving you, the person who made that choice with neither spouse nor money i.e. divorced and poor. So it would be logical to choose single and rich, and if you hold out long enough, you'll have a head start on your capital accumulation (damned economics class) such that by the time you get a girlfriend, you'll have a much more significant amount of buffer cash such that your girlfriend will not ditch you the moment she finds out you are poor.

Now without further ado, here are top 10 reasons why a PSP is better than a girlfriend.

10. PSPs don't mind if you don't their birthdays or anniversaries.
9. You can share your PSP with your friends.
8. A PSP won't feel jealous when you are watching ESPN or playing poker.
7. A PSP won't mind your sloppy shirt, unwashed laundry and messy apartment.
6. One PSP game, 40 dollars. One romantic dinner, 400 dollars. One diamond ring, 4000 dollars.
5. A PSP won't mind you playing with other PSPs or your ex-console games.
4. A PSP won't complain after you play with it and chuck it aside to hang out with the guys.
3. A PSP can give hours of pleasure, anytime, anywhere, even on the subway and on the bus.
2. You can always turn off the PSP anytime when it makes too much noise.
1. A PSP would always work, any time of the month.

-----------------------------------
Hah! And I wonder why I'm single.

What's in a name?

Wait, have I asked that question before? Nah, I don't think I have. But I was wondering, does my name in anyway reflect my destiny? What is a Jason? What is in a Jason? I do not know, is there suppose to be some sort of meaning behind the name? Anyway, I don't really believe in a fixed destiny and all, just not my style. I rather blame the sad outcome of my life of how lazy I was and why I don't give a rats ass about anything else in this world.

I was wondering why did my parents give me that name?

Why that name in particular? Why not Herocles? Or Attila the Hun? Or Rosenberg? Or Zzbrt? Or Nike, and get a huge lump sum endorsement and a monthly stipend for the rest of my life?

Anyway, I'm still stuck with this name, and I'm too lazy to go get it changed, and mostly because I have no idea what to change it to. But interestingly enough, if I could choose a name, I have no idea what to choose. Maybe this is just a representation of the significance, or lackthereof, of myself. Anyway, whatever, now if I could choose a name for myself what would it be?

Suggestions?

I guess I'm an old man. My memory seems to be failing me, I get a bit grouchier every morning, my hands shake, and I can't concentrate anymore. Maybe I'm suffering from some early form of Parkinson's disease. Maybe I'm doomed to die. Wait, I am doomed to die. But maybe at an early age. Dammit, I wonder why do my hands shake now. A semi-uncontrollable twitching. Ah who cares, dinner.

I think I shall recount some of the stories my World Cultures Russia professor tells in lectures. I find it amusing and insightful. Here's an anecdote about the Russian economy and how it is cheaper buy a plane ticket from Moscow to Armenia and come back with a crate of tomatoes.

An Armenian was taking a plane from Armenia to Moscow, when suddenly three hijackers jumped up from their seats, brandishing guns. They demanded everyone to sit down and told the pilot to fly to New York. The Armenian, who was a small guy, heard this, and decided to fight back. He fought single-handedly against those three huge burly hijackers, and then took them all down, and then the plane flew to Moscow.

When he got off the plane at Moscow, reporters rushed him, asking him many questions about his heroism and bravery, and the fact he took on three guys all larger than him. "Why did you do it?" a reporter asked him.

"Because what am I gonna do with 10,000 tomatoes in New York?"

What was it again? Ever ran away from home to look for home, and when you come knocking on the door only to find that nobody is home? This summer I want to go home.

Today, I figured that I would make a pilgrimage to a place in Central Park known as Poet's Walk. It's also known as the Literary Walk. The statues of the great writers and poets are there in a path where the trees overshadows the walk and the glinting sunlight shines through the overhanging branches and illuminates the writers below like specks of gold on bronze.

Perhaps it would have been a good pilgrimage, it might inspire me to write again, I might find a little purpose in this mess. I wanted to go, I would traverse the roads and walked for hours. But I didn't make it, there was not enough time. I failed in my pilgrimage. Maybe, it means something. What?

Beware the Ides of March.

There comes a time in a man's life when he is at start realisation of his own mortality and futility of his own actions. While I type this, the movie Gladiator is playing in the background and Maximus goes, "Do you not understand? I may die in this cell tonight, or in the arena tomorrow. I am a slave. What possible difference can I make?"

I may die in my room tonight, or on the streets of New York tomorrow.

There is a sort of pointlessness in the air tonight, a sinister essence that pervades the air I breathe, and it creeps and crawls like the chill of the night. I ask myself, "What is the point of it all?" and when I sit in contemplation, I wonder "What the hell am I doing?"

Who am I? I am a writer. No, I lost the right to call myself that anymore. I've alwayds dreamed of writing. But then, dreaming is all I have done. Nothing more. How then can I be a writer? To hang up the pencil, and only write for grades, that is all that is left for me to do now.

I am thinking of retiring this blog. After so long, there is only so much a person can write. The quality of drivel that I write has dipped a long time ago, and yet I still strive on. What to I hope to accomplish by this blog? Why do I write this? For who do I write this? For what do I write this? I don't know.

If writing was ever an expression of the self, I've stopped expressing myself a long time ago. There is nothing to express. Unfeeling, that's what I've become. Perhaps I am the embodiment of the Thinker, the same statue that Auguste Rodin carved out of stone, yet in flesh and blood. But how do we differ on the inside? Not by much I'm afraid.

Perhaps I should give up thinking. I think too much. All of you have said so.

"Good evening, Clarice."

Jason: I was thinking about getting married...

Childish Jason: Oooh... someone wants get married, he wants to get some smoochie smoochies.

Kinky Jason; Oh sure, I think wants to get more than that... hehe... missing out on a little bit of action aren't we?

Mature Jason: Is that all you ever think of? Look, this guy's not getting any younger...

Sarcastic Jason: He's not get any either.

Responsible Jason: Hey hey... pottery barn rule, you pop the cherry, you pay for it.

Cynical Jason: Marriage is the longest sentence.

Romantic Jason: I think it's just sweet he's thinking of getting married.

Lonely Jason: Yeah, it would be nice to spend the rest of his days with someone special. He needs someone.

Macho Jason: Bah! Real men don't need someone else. Real men need beer, fast car and a good lifetime porn subscription.

Sensitive Jason: What about his emotional needs? What about his own personal welfare? What about growing old?

Old Fogey Jason: If you were old like me, you wouldn't want to find yourself married to a wrinkled old hag.

Dreamer Jason: ... and live happily ever after.

Gibberish Jason: Guh duh buh wha...

Sensible Jason: Nonsense, he's 21, he should be thinking about the future.

Pampered Jason: But he's too young to be thinking of marriage? Isn't that something you do when you're an adult?

Drill Sergeant Jason: You just wanna get out of the army, get out of boot camp and have some fun don't you? Don't you! Don't look at me! And address me as Sire! And do 1000 pushups! Now! In the rain! With no clothes!

Sardonic Jason: And that's kinda how marriage is.

Contemplative Jason: I wonder who he wants to marry.

Contemptible Jason: I wonder whether he even has someone in mind.

Hurt Jason: You guys don't give a rats ass about his feelings at all do you? All you do is chant me, me, me and me.

Selfish Jason: That's my job.

Defender of Justice Jason: Give the guy a break! He wants to think of marriage, let him think!

Delusional Jason: Get married, settle down in a nice house in the suburbs with two kids and two cars and a nice pet dog named Benny. Then spend the rest of your retirement money on Prozac.

Cheap Jason: You want a wife? Get a slut instead. Same sexual gratification. Her rates are lower, and you get free STDs too.

High class Jason: You can't marry below your noble stature. She must be a purebred, of high class and nobility, refined and cultured, able to tell the different between pignot greigo and contandi castaldi.

Down to Earth Jason: Cut the crap. Dude, just marry who you like. We'll love her anyway.

Demoralised Jason: I wonder if any girl would like him in the first place. He's ugly, dense, hard to please and too sarcastic.

Egotistical Jason: Who wouldn't love a guy like him? Brave, strong, courageous, witty, charming...

Paranoid Jason: For all you know, the girl he chooses might be a fem-bot with the sole intention of assassinating him. Or worse, she might be a he!

Homophobe Jason: No!! No no no no no! Death to such ugly thoughts!

Realistic Jason: Well if he's gonna get married someday, he might as well think of it.

Evil Jason: No! He can't get married! We have plans together! Take over the world, build a death ray, enslave the human population, visit the strip club on 41th Street!

Xtreme Jason: Dude! What about xtreme bungee jumping? Or xtreme stuff like sticking your head in the oven? You're not going to leave me to do those things alone are you?

Domesticated Jason: Listen guys, I know I made all those promises, but I have a commitment that I cannot break... I can't leave my wife, what if she needs me?

Sardonic Jason: Face it, you're just tired of being alone. Get a life.

Apathetic Jason: Ah, what the heck.

... and the debate continues.

Must resist blogging. Cannot turn away from studies. Must read. Must learn. Must memorise. You are powerless to resist. The books call to you. You must read. You must learn. You must memorise.

Political science is not a science. As far as I'm concerned, political science is an oxymoron. Politics and science do not go together under any circumstance. Just imagine putting Albert Einstein and George 'Dubya' Bush in the same room. Einstein would try to explain how the atomic bomb works, and 'Dubya' would be screaming, "Let's blow those Iraqis out of this world!" To further prove my point that politics and science don't go together, when was the last time we looked at a politician and go, "Hmm... he's a smart guy, he could be a scientist."? In fact, most of the times we go, "Damned stupid Republican, raising taxes again." When was the last time a scientist became a politician either?

Political science is just a whole bunch of banal jargon meant to disguise a lack of intellect or thought put into proper layman terms. No explanation of political science can be given in layman's terms; no, that would be degrading to the entire school of political thought, for everything must be explained in completely technical terms that it just baffles the public, other members of this school and authorities for the purpose of looking like an authority on the subject of political science. I think political scientists are so used to the lexicon of the field that this language barrier only serves as an obstacle so great, so high, that once you jumped over this fence, you realize you are just on the other side of the exact same field, divided by a fence in the middle of nowhere which barricades nothing and serves no purpose other than to intrigue the masses on the other side what's on this side of the fence. And once some of them do jump over the fence to discover that there's nothing new or remotely fascinating on this side, they start congratulating themselves on breaching this new field of 'knowledge', having gleaned more 'information' and imbue themselves with the aura that they can explain any simple political situation in complex banalities which shows the greatness of the field that they stand it like a Russian royal party, not knowing that everyone is looking at the same stars and moon, no matter which side of the fence you are on.

You just gotta love Wikipedia. They have provided information for so many papers of mine, and also semi-useless questions that I just want to ask for the sake of asking. Well, I guess I have a chance to return back to these guys all the invaluable report/research material they have given to me by donating to their cause here. Though I am a poor college student, I'll contribute USD2.00 and this link to others who feel that they would like to share in this brilliant source of information.

Yeah, my enthusiasm for Wikipedia is not just me, you should read some of the funkier comments people leave on Wikipedia. C'mon these are really good.

May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the underpants of your enemies - CHRISTOPHER J HUTTEN CZAPS

Sorry I can't give more, university being the cost that it is, but thanks! - Jim Bone

Wikipedia, is there anything it can't do? - Anonymous

is there really a 200 character max? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? really? ok - Anonymous

This site is fantastic! Sorry I can't give more - unemployed student

Wikipedia is dangerous. It is free, it is fair, it is informative, it is fun. Nothing beats it. Nothing even comes close. - Christopher Hutten-Czapski

May wikipedia live long and prosper! - Anonymous

I am but a poor student, alas here is 3USD for Wikipedia! Keep up the good work! - Michael Rausch

Because knowledge may be free, but servers are not. - Anonymous

I've learned quite a bit of useless knowledge from this website. Free knowledge is the greatest gift of all! Keep up the great work. -A future teacher - Nicholas G Mason

Ideosyncratically euphuistic eccentricities are the promulgators of triturable obfuscation. - Anonymous

What did we do before Wiki? - Anonymous

Spread your Squids around the world. And use cached pages for logged in users as well. Fix those and I'll be happy as a clam. Good job so far!!! - Rami Lehti

Help preserve the sum total of human knowledge for less than the price of two Caramel Frappuccinos. Wikipedia is not only fat-free and carbohydrate-free, it will never go straight to your hips! - Jonet Greene

A beautiful site, even if you deleted my vanity page. - Grant Huling

Thanks, I lose a lot of time with Wikipedia expanding my knowledge :) - Alberto Martinez

I'd rather read Wikipedia than my college text books. - William Rose

Merci Wiki! Je ne sais pas qui tu es mais tu m'aides beaucoup! Vive la révolution informatique:) - Jolene Lessard

The Bear wishes you well - Anonymous

Once in a lifetime someone comes up with a great idea that imrpoves the democracy of ideas (PI) - Anonymous

power to the pedia! - Anonymous

After learning so much from your site, I owe you at least this. (Woooo! Cheaper than college!) - Anonymous

A better world is possible -- and this is an example of that better world - grupoHuracan Corporation

I wouldn't pass Philosophy without this site. - Anonymous

Wisdom of the Crowds rules the Long Tail - Anonymous

To prevent commercialization of knowledge - Anonymous

Because I owe Dysprosia 5$ - Jonathan Cary

Onwards and upwards! - Yuri Astrakhan

Small price to pay to keep knowledge free... and reduce my cynicism! - Anonymous

The sum of all human knowledge - do I have to say more? : ) - Haavard Andersen

wikipedia saved my sanity! Me now lern lotza wordz! - Ken barraclough

Wikimedia is the epitome of what the Internet should be: For the public, By the public. - Ezra Pincus-Roth

"...Wikipedia has already supplanted the great Encyclopedia Galactica as the standard repository of all knowledge and wisdom..." (with apologies to Douglas Adams) - Christopher Allen

This is an world treasure!! Save Wikipedia before the deluge!!! Time is running out!! - Anonymous

Free love in the new republic! - Christofer Chiappa

Education wants to be free! - Anonymous

Probably the most useful website in the world (and proof that wiki's work). Well done! - Mr D A Whiting

Free knowledge is even better than free porn. - Steve Guy